He’d just come home from working all night and found her like that, a terrible sight. A pair of policemen went into the house and questioned the poor woman’s spouse.
There’s been a murder, a woman was killed,įound in a bathtub, partially filled. The only drawback is, you see, Getting out quickly when I have to pee. #Funny short phrases that rhyme full
My jar’s so cozy, warm and bright, Even in the full moonlight. He grimaced and said, how bizarre you are. Why is heaven such a doggie-delight? Why, because there’s not a single cat in sight! - Larry Hugginsįor a stranger sight you’d have to go far. They run and play along the streets of Gold.
All doggies go to heaven (or so I’ve been told). In life’s ring let’s be clowns Laugh and sing at ups and downs! - Wilhelmina Stitch In life’s ring let’s be clowns! Learn their way to make folk smile Dullest day, hardest mile. Ogden NashĪirs and graces, capering clowns! Noses painted (reds and browns) Look! they’ve fainted foolish clowns! East and west, cities, towns, clap with zest circus clowns. I might love the people upstairs more If only they lived on another floor. They try to get their parties to mix By supplying their guests with Pogo sticks, And when their fun at last abates, They go to the bathroom on roller skates. When they take a shower, your ceilings leak. Their radio is louder than yours, They celebrate week-ends all the week. Their living room is a bowling alley Their bedroom is full of conducted tours. The people upstairs all practice ballet. He looks like a fool, when he jumps in the pool, and reminds me of a sinking ship. Dorothy ParkerĮxcept when he takes a dip. Three be the things I shall have till I die: Laughter and hope and a sock in the eye. Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne. Four be the things I’d been better without: Love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt. “Let’s get this problem to end.” “When I turn the signal on, If it’s working, let me know.” I hit the blinker and then I heard: “Yes! No! Yes! No! Yes! No!” - Joanna Fuchs UnknownĪnd owns a boutique I just bought a cactus It died in a week. She followed her nose, One day, I suppose, And no one knows which way she went. I loudly swear and I curse Did I leave them in my purse? Are they behind the sofa, under the bed? Oh there they are – on my head! - Anne Scott I’ve lost my glasses, I’m in need, To have them now so I can read. Need more poetry in your life? We have breakup poems, sex poems, and more! We rounded up a number of funny poems that are sure to keep you laughing and will brighten the rest of your day. Funny poems are famous for inspiring good vibes and keeping readers on their toes with clever witticisms, irony, and plain old silliness. When you’re feeling down, sometimes all it takes is reading a funny limerick or rhyme to lift your spirits. Spread the chuckles and check out our hilarious list of funny poems that are guaranteed to add some cheer. So if you’d like to add some beauty and laughs to someone’s day, we have a bunch for you to choose from. You can slip them into your lover’s purse or use one to teach your kiddo to read. 
A humorous haiku or a funny sonnet can brighten up anyone’s day and you can use them for just about any occasion.
Poems are as old as time and the right one can feel like a ray of sun.
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